Sunday 29 September 2013

Argentinian 6 year old changes gender

Say what you like about the Argentinians, at least they have the right idea about Gender Identity:

"Luana, known as Lulu, is believed to be the youngest to benefit from the country’s new Gender Identity Law, which was approved in May 2012.

"The act enshrines the right to be identified by name and sex as defined by the individual.

"As a result, the governor of Buenos Aires, Daniel Scioli, approved Lulu’s application to change her name from Manuel on her DNI, the Argentinian identity card, and birth certificate."

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/southamerica/argentina/10339296/Six-year-old-becomes-first-transgender-child-in-Argentina-to-change-identity.html

Thursday 26 September 2013

Here's a funny thing...

I posted a comment on the story from the Cambridge News about the BDSM workshop that was cancelled by the Trustees of the Village Hall because they didn't want that sort of thing there.

I've just had a call from the paper saying they've had to take the comment down because I mentioned my website in it, but how would I like to put a banner advert at the top of the page of one of their stories on it?!

So keep an eye on this page because Affordable Leather's banner will be appearing on it shortly!

LOL!!!!


The latest nonsense...

Peer Rope Cambridge, a BDSM group, intended to hire a village hall for an event, however following some (as usual) over-blown coverage in the local media with lots of salacious nudge-nudge tittle-tattle, the Trustees cancelled the booking claiming it had been made "under false pretences".

http://www.cambridge-news.co.uk/News/Village-hall-in-Cambridge-offers-bondage-on-a-budget-workshops-with-tea-and-biscuits-thrown-in-20130925043928.htm

The story has now hit the mainstream media with this article from the BBC and similar ones in The Guardian and other press.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cambridgeshire-24240287

Frankly this is a complete storm in a teacup with lots of prurient lip-smacking details (mostly grubbed from the event's flyers or website by slothful journalists) and a quote from an "outraged" great-grandmother.

Some people have said that this is not the sort of pubicity that BDSM needs, however I think that it's actually positive because although, in the short term, it may put people off attending or even organising such events, in the long run many people will look at the reaction of the Trustees and think "what a prudish bunch of idiots".

If you don't like something, don't go to it, but don't try to stop others from enjoying something which does no harm by saying "We don't like it, so you're not allowed to do it!"


Tuesday 17 September 2013

Sex and Censorship Campaign - Monday 23rd September

Britain has one of the most heavily censored regimes for TV and DVDs in the Western World and now, as mentioned previously in Graham's BDSM Blog, David Cameron wants to introduce compulsory blocking of "adult content" unless you choose to opt out (and, probably, have that fact recorded), despite many computer experts pointing out that such blocks are impossible to enforce and easily circumvented.

The Sex and Censorship campaign was set up to provide a sensible voice to the media to counter all the scare stories about Domestic Violence and Teenage Pregnancy which appear in our newspapers and on TV and ensure that scientific facts and proper research are used to decide policy, rather than biased opinions and anecdotal evidence.

On Monday the 23rd of September at 7pm there will be a meeting at The Radisson Edwardian Bloomsbury Hotel in central London. see here for a flyer with more details.

XBIZ EU are hosting the event as part of their 2013 conference. If you are planning to come, please register here and use the code XEU134TOTA to gain free access to the meeting.



Tuesday 3 September 2013

Thank you David Cameron!

Following David Cameron's brilliant idea of everyone being forced to opt in to his Internet Porn Ban, just go along to Cameron Porn (totally SFW) safe in the knowledge that you won't be corrupted by the eeeevilll porn and can just enjoy the intelligent dialogue, magnificent acting and wonderful music without all the disgusting sex spoiling the fun!


Monday 2 September 2013

Subspace and Sub-Drop



Many BDSM players will have heard of "Subspace", which has nothing to do with the Star Trek universe, but is that wonderfully floaty, "without a care" sensation that a submissive or bottom can get in a scene to the extent that even something that would usually cause intense pain can instead become a source of pleasure and arousal.

There is, however, a downside to this, in that someone who is deeply into subspace may not realise that they are actually at risk of injury because their body's normal reactions are being subverted by adrenaline and endorphins which their system is putting out and warning signals can be ignored.

As such, whilst a submissive can use a Safeword to stop a scene, they may not know that they need to use one or, possibly, can be in a incoherent state and simply be unable to Safeword.

In a situation like this, it is the job and the responsibility of the Dominant or Top to keep an eye on their submissive's mental and physical state and, if they think that the sub is too far gone for reasonable safety, to slow things down or even bring the scene to a close.

Of course it's not as simple as just saying "ok, that's it". When you have a sub or bottom who is in this situation, they need proper aftercare and attention to gently bring them out from subspace and slowly return them to the ground from that lovely floaty place they may have been in.


Even then, it's still wise to be aware that there's a phenomenon known as "Sub-Drop". This can take a physical form where your body suddenly stops producing the chemicals it's been putting out, resulting in an almost Cold Turkey state. Coming down from an adrenaline and endorphin high can be a real bitch as the body has been burning up energy (from the adrenaline) and relying on the natural pain killers of endorphins so, when they stop, it may be a sudden shock to the system.

There is also a mental form of Sub-Drop (which may not occur until several days after the session) when the real world suddenly comes crashing back in and the sub may get feelings of lack of self-worth, guilt over society's attitudes to BDSM or simply a reaction of "OMG, what did I *do*?!"

In either case, again it the responsibility of the Top or Dominant to care for the sub or bottom and keep in communication with them, reinforce their self-esteem, praise them for taking what they have been given and checking to ensure that negative effects are ameliorated.

Here is a very good article which deals comprehensively with the effects of Subspace and Sub-Drop and good ways to handle situations which may arise from it and it is well worth a read.